The Two Sheds Mix Tape 51: Tribute to Jim Steinman

The music world is in mourning again with the passing of one of the greatest songwriters of all time, the great Jim Steinman.

Steinman will, without a doubt, be best remembered for his collaborations with Meat Loaf, beginning with their 1977 classic Bat Out of Hell. It really is one of the greatest albums of all time, and it wasn’t surprising that it stayed in the charts for so many years.

Twenty Years (and Two Days Ago) This Happened

So 20 years (and 2 days) ago this happened, my first ever live show review. To be completely honest I'm surprised that the powers-that-be haven't been all over social media with their usual boasts, biggest show in Britain at the time, 2,000 fans, you know the sort of things.

But then again maybe the people who constantly go on about what they've achieved over the years are finally taking the advice they used to give me and have stopped living in the past.

Anyway, enjoy this old review, a piece that sent me on a journey filled with good times and bad, full of promises that were never kept and debts that were never repaid.

If you want to watch the show it's available online somewhere. I'm not going to tell you where it is. After all, they never tell people where my site is!

http://twoshedsreview.blogspot.com/2019/01/re-post-waw-fightmare-april-2001-live.html

Clothes Maketh The Man

There’s an old saying - clothes maketh the man - and that’s certainly true if you’re a key worker using public transport at the moment.

I recently started work for Morrisons again. This time around I’m working as a picker, picking out online orders for home deliveries. I’ve mainly starting at 5am, although I’m doing 4am starts now, often finishing some time between 9am and 11am, depending on when I start. So as you can imagine I’m quite tired when I finish my shift, and even though I only live about a mile or so from the store I get the bus home.

New Fiction Addition: Anglo-Force - Refuge On Ikotia

With public and political opinion beginning to turn against them, Anglo-Force may have found somewhere they can take refuge if need be, the Caribbean island of Ikotia.

Originally written in 1995 and shamelessly ripped-off from an X-Men cartoon, "Refuge on Ikotia" was the 19th Anglo-Force story. Click on the links below to read the chapters.

 

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

This May Be My Last Post Here

This may be my last post here.

 

Tomorrow morning at 11.10am I will be injected with the covid vaccine, and from that moment on Bill Gates will be able to control every aspect of my life, thanks to the microchips that are in the chemicals.

 

I have no idea how Mr. Gates will use me exactly, but I hope I will play a major part in his grand design for the planet Earth and the human race.

 

So hail and farewell to everyone, and if I don't turn up for work next week tell my boss that they can probably contact Mr. Gates through the Microsoft head office.

 

#youwillbeassimilated

Monty vs Johnny Rotten

Monty is now 0-2 in staring contests. Having previously lost to my Jar Jar Binks mug a few years ago he's now lost to the visage of punk legend John Lydon.

 

This screenshot came from the music player on my tablet a few nights ago. Monty sat on the bed staring at the screeen for about twenty seconds before turning away and curling up on his woolly blanket. Seems he couldn't handle Mr. Rotten looking at him anymore.

New Fiction Addition: The Journeys of Magus

As the planet Gallifrey tries to forge links with the United Federation of Planets a young Time Lord named Drathro expresses a desire to travel with the Doctor. But when the Doctor refuses his request he suggests that Drathro travels with another doctor, a certain immortal wizard by the name of Phineas Magus.

Orignally written in 1995 and intended as a second spin-off from The Valkyrie Chronicles, The Journeys of Magus sees the wizard putting together a crew, including the legendary engineer Montgomery Scott and former Enterprise crew member Sonya Gomez, as they take on an old starship so Drathro can learn the ways of the universe before becoming Gallifrey's first ambassador to the Federation.

It was also the end of an era in a way as it was the last story I wrote on battered old typewriters before I got a brand spanking new Casio electronic typewriter!

(Oh, in case you're wondering why David Tennant's is pictured here when the story was written nine years before he played the Doctor you'll have to read the story!)

You can read this short story by clicking on the links below:

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

When Frank Lampard Burned My House Down

Earlier today Facebook reminded me of a dream I had eight years ago: 

I had a very weird dream last night. Frank Lampard, while on a training run past my house, ripped up an electrical cable and threw it into one of my neighbour's gardens. The cable set fire to the lawn, and subsequently burnt down almost every house in my road, including mine.

 

I managed to get the dogs and cats out in time, but for some reason I kept thinking the only person who could call the fire brigade was my brother Jon. He was on the old practice course near the golf club, working on his swing.

 
The really weird thing about this dream is that Jon doesn't even like golf!

Thank You NHS

A year ago I was in hospital for my heart procedure. "We'll get you back in in three months time for your check-up" they said.

 

About seven weeks later everything was put on hold because of covid. The appointment was postponed until October and done over the phone. My regular blood test was postponed until the end of December. I normally have another one in February but that will probably have to wait.

 

Some are critical of the NHS because they've had to delay other treatments because of the pandemic. I'm not. I know my case is nothing compared to some, but I'll always be grateful for the treatment I've had since my first heart problems in 2015. We should be proud of what they've accomplished in the past year.

 

A year ago the nurse looking after me hugged me before I left the hospital. I wonder how many times she's wanted to do that with her patients since then but couldn't because of this damn virus.

 

Thank you NHS.

A Conversation About Joe Biden

Social media is one of the greatest tools of the modern world. It allows you to keep in touch with friends and family around the world, especially at the moment given that most of us are in lockdown in one form or another.

It also gives us a chance to be a bit nosey as we get to see other people’s conversations without actually taking part in them. Such was the case the other day when I saw a conversation started by a former acquaintance about the new President of the United States, Joe Biden.

My Wrestling Commentary Debut

Nearly 18 years ago this happened. Yours truly wanted to be a professional wrestling commentator, and I got the chance here.

The show cost £1,000 to film, which, given the production quality, was an overpayment of about £975. At the time I was deep into my black dog period and on a serious amount of anti-depressants, so I was probably zonked out of my skull at the time.

I was also probably the only person who worked on this show who never got paid. Even some of the lads who turned up and volunteered to help put up the ring just so they could get in and watch the show for free were given a few quid for their troubles.

The Rise of the Covidiot

It’s been nearly ten months since the country went into it’s first coronavirus lockdown. The memories of what I experienced personally on March 23rd, 2020 are still clear in the mind.

A hell of a lot has happened since that day, but there’s something that has risen, something that has come to prominence since that day that is really starting to annoy me more and more, and that, ladies and gentlemen, is the covidiot.

Covidiots have become as prominent as the virus itself. You can’t go a day without seeing someone on your social media feed spouting some sort of nonsense about the pandemic, posting videos or images about how the whole thing is one big lie and how the lockdown is just another attempt by the governments of the world to control an increasingly agitated population.

When Phil Collins Was a Labrador

Here’s something for you dream interpretation peeps out there, although I doubt you’d be able to tell me what this means exactly.

The other night I dreamt that Pink Floyd legend David Gilmour had moved in next door, and being a fan I decided to pay him a visit. I found him sitting in a deck chair in the front garden, enjoying the sunshine with a Golden Labrador dog laying on the ground nearby.

It Wasn't Wrong to Mourn Bowie's Passing

Today, January 10th, 2021, marks the fifth anniversary of David Bowie’s passing. I’ve already written about the effect his life and death had on me and others in my Mix Tape post, but there was one aspect of what I saw around that time that always gets me thinking.

New Fiction Addition: The Valkyrie Chronicles - Return of the Blob

An Earth-bound adventure for Captain James Watt, commanding officer of the U.S.S. Valkyrie, as he meets up with his newest crew member and journeys to Alaska to find out why all contact with a tracking station has been lost.

Originally written in January 1995 and inspired by a classic 1950's creature feature, the short story "Return of the Blob" is now available to read online by clicking on the links below:

 

Chapter One

Chapter Two

New Fiction Addition: Anglo-Force - Future Tense

Space Ghost returns from the future for the first time to stop the killing of a prominent politician in the hope that it will stop Skynet and their Terminators taking over the world.

Yep, it's another blast from my past. Shamelessly ripping off an old X-Men story and throwing in a bunch of Terminators, Future Tense is the eighteenth story from my Anglo-Force archive and is now available to read online for the first time. Click on the links below to read the chapters. 

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

New Fiction Addition: Pegasus - The Beginning

Inspired by Babylon 5 and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and originally written in 1995, Pegasus was originally conceived as the first of two spin-offs from The Valkyrie Chronicles.

Set in a space station in orbit around a magical and mystical planet the idea was to combine characters from from the Star Trek-inspired Valkyrie series with those from myth and fantasy, but in the end the sole Pegasus short story became a set-up story for Civil War, the multi-crossover story which was the biggest thing I'd ever written, a story which was never finished.

Seeing as it was the only Pegasus story I wrote I've put it on The Valkyrie Chronicles page instead of giving it a page of it's own. You can read the entire short story by clicking on the links below.

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Lockdown II Is Turning Out To Be The Disappointing Sequel

Is it just me or has Lockdown II become another one of those disappointing sequels?

Don't get me wrong, this is something we drastically needed. The coronavirus infection rates were rising, and it was obvious that we were in a second wave. But when Uncle Boris announced the second lockdown there just wasn't that same sense of urgency among the people of the United Kingdom. 

Back in March the country, for the most part, stuck to the rules and helped others out. We did everything, from helping people collect their prescriptions to getting their shopping and trying to make sure that those of us who were most in need got what they needed.

New Fiction Addition: The Valkyrie Chronicles: A Time Of Change

When Arthur Pendragon is promoted to captain and given command of the new Pegasus station in orbit around the Time of Legends Captain James Watt begins his search for a new first officer. Two high-profile candidates make their ambitions known, but will Watt promote from within or go elsewhere?

"A Time of Change", the 13th Valkyrie Chronicles story, is the beginning of a three-story cycle that saw a number of changes to the shared universe I had created, and ultimately it led to a massive story which....no, you'll just have to wait to find out what that story was. For now you can read the two chapters of this short story by clicking on the links below:

Chapter One

Chapter Two

New Fiction Addition: Anglo-Force: The Best of Both Worlds

As Captain James Watt and Red Sun finally tie the knot scientist Dr. Daniel Reid and wizard Dr. Phineas Magus discover that there are a multitude - or rather a multiverse - of possibilities they set off to explore what's on the other side of the portal. However, their discovery leads to some rather unsavoury characters making their own way from one London to another.

Originally written in 1994, Anglo-Force: The Best of Both Worlds, draws inspiration from the legendary DC Comics meetings between the Justice League and the Justice Society, and feature some characters of the characters I used way back when, before Anglo-Force was ever created, as well as borrowing a few from a few other sources.

You can read this short story in full by clicking on the links below:

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four