Tuesday, 19 October 2021

The Madness Returns - Chapter One

    The last thought, the last sentient thought, that had passed through the mind of Woodwose was why? Up until recently he had been a refugee from a distant planet, driven out of his home, off his planet by the tyrant known only as the High Wolfman. Even then, when he had made a home on Earth and found friends in humans was his safety at risk from his own kind. Colonel Chaney had come across the galaxy seeking revenge on his old enemy, driving him insane, causing pain and destruction wherever he went. Still, even after the Q had cured him of his madness all was not right. Freed by the disgraced General Billiar the madness returned after an encounter with one Armand Theophilus.
    Now his every waking thought consisted of one thing, rage. Pure, primal, animal rage. The madness had reverted Woodwose back to his animal instincts. All intelligent thoughts were gone. He lived on animal instincts alone. He had no memories of his previous life. His only memories were those of his last fight against a man who didn’t look like he would have a chance against this mighty man-beast. This man stood more than a chance against the mighty Woodwose. He matched him power for pure raw power. This man had captured Woodwose after an epic battle. Now Woodwose, free, away from the cage he had been kept in after he was captured, now had the chance for revenge, revenge against the human who had beaten him, and revenge against those who had tried to stop him before.

Thursday, 7 October 2021

New Fiction Addition: Anglo-Force - Corporation

As the fallout from the Cyberdine incident continues James Watt recieves an offer from a man who wants to put his company's seedy reputation behind them. Is it a genuine offer? 

Originally written in 1995, the 20th Anglo-Force story, Corporation, is now online for the first time and can be read by clicking on the links below!

Tuesday, 21 September 2021

How Would You Like To Know?

I have a question for you, although this is really aimed at a certain group of people. The question is this: if something happened to me, how would you like to find out about it?

The reason I’m asking this particular question is quite simple. We live in a day and age where social media is king, it’s the premier way of finding out how a person is doing and what’s been happening to them, be it good, bad, or otherwise.

Tuesday, 24 August 2021

The Time Travel Dream: Should We Tell Them?

In the past I’ve shared with you some of the dreams I’ve had, dreams which included strange occurrences such as footballer Frank Lampard burning my house down and professional wrestler Jeff Jarrett painting my shed orange.

The dream I’m about to share with you is actually quite a personal one, and I have to admit that I did have second thoughts about putting pen to paper as it were, and while I have no idea what those other dreams meant it’s pretty obvious that I wouldn’t need a dream interpreter to find out what this one means.

This dream saw me and my brother Michael somehow travelling back in time. We found ourselves standing outside our old four bedroom house on Lynewood Road. We could tell instantly that it was April 1982, and the family were gathering to celebrate my brother Jon’s 21st birthday.

Tuesday, 17 August 2021

Rest In Peace Homer

In 2010 after a young black cat was born his mother went crazy and killed all of his siblings not long after they were born. Luckily for him the cat’s owners managed to get to him before his mother did. They cared for him and reared him by hand, nick-naming him “Titch” as he grew into a big bruiser of a thing.

A year or so later they had to find a new home for him, and that’s where I come in. After replying to an online ad my brother went to collect him, and he became a member of our family. The “Titch” moniker was more of a nickname, so I decided to name him after my favourite comedy character, Homer Simpson.

Sunday, 8 August 2021

The Two Sheds Mix Tapes 52-55: The Genesis Effect *UPDATED AUGUST 8TH*

They were considered giants of progressive rock before they morphed into one of the giants of 80’s rock, and along the way their members have forged successful solo careers and seconds bands. They’re also one of my all-time favourites, so it seems fitting that the mighty Genesis gets The Two Sheds Mix Tape treatment.

Friday, 16 July 2021

What Were You Doing When You Were 19?

Can I ask you, what were you were doing when you were 19 years old?

Me? I was washing dishes in a local hotel, enjoying free beer in the hotel bar while getting occasionally drunk, and spending a great deal of my wages on tapes and compact discs in my local branch of Woolworths.

I wasn’t standing in the middle of 60,000 people in a stadium or a television audience of 31 million, about to take a penalty that could send the nation into a rapturous celebration or a deep depression.

Tuesday, 6 July 2021

They'll Still Watch EastEnders

One of the things that covid anti-vaxxers seem to go on about a great deal is their distrust for mainstream media. Since the pandemic began they’ve constantly told us that companies such as the BBC, ITV and Sky have been lying to use about everything, and that their news and current affairs programmes are all a part of some big worldwide conspiracy to control us.

They tell us that we should boycott them, that we shouldn’t watch their news output, but when they tell us this they seem to forget something.

Monday, 5 July 2021

The Cricket Was Great, But There Was Something Missing

I was watching the World Test Championship final between New Zealand and India a couple of weeks ago (congratulations to New Zealand on their big win by the way). The standard of cricket on display was very high, as was expected from the best two teams in the world, but despite all of this there was something gnawing away at the back of my mind. There was something that didn’t seem right with the game, and I’m not talking about the days that were lost to the glorious British summer weather.

Friday, 2 July 2021

Should've Gone To Iceland

I was in a local supermarket today (not the one I work in) when I overheard a member of staff telling a customer how they were always "short staffed" and how they desperately needed new people.
 
I felt like asking her "if that's the case then why does your head office continually reject my applications, even though I have current supermarket experience?" (I applied for one of their constantly-advertised vacancies just a few days ago.)
 
Instead I just calmly walked past and got some of the tasty triple chocolate ice cream that Morrisons doesn't stock.